If you're new to the site, you may want to check out my previous blog about my World Race mission trip at hannahdagenhart.theworldrace.org.
The World Race: 11 countries in 11 months. Now that's something I can blog about. Traveling on rickety European trains, riding elephants in Thailand, eating fried squid in Malaysia. The year was full of excitement. It went by in the blink of an eye and I can't believe I'm already settled in again at home. How can I begin to wrap up what went on? In what ways can I show you, tell you, how God changed my life? When will I ever figure out what "normal" looks like again?
Within my first few weeks back from the World Race I've had some chances to speak about my experiences. I'm sure I'll be processing the events of the past year for many years to come, but some thoughts have already grabbed my attention. Most recently I had an older woman say to me, with a smile on her face: "We're so glad you're home now. You don't ever have to go back there again do you?" I gave her a smile and a clever joke as an answer, not really wanting to show how I was feeling on the inside.
I know that people mean well, but they may not understand how their words that were meant to encourage can sometimes come off as shallow or selfish. In no way do I think this lady was insincere; she was a sweet person just trying to make conversation. The thing that got me was the implied meaning in her statement. "You don't ever have to go back there again do you?" Where did she think I came from? A deep dark prison cell in the middle of a desert? How terrible it must be to eat strange things, be dirty all the time and sleep on cold, hard surfaces. Those are temporary physical circumstances. Didn't she wonder about the powerful prayer times and the intimate worship sessions with believers in other nations? What about the spiritual gains of such a trip? I can't say that I was offended, just disappointed really. I wanted to tell her, I'm praying that I'll be given an opportunity to go back because those rough, dirty conditions are the very places where I felt Jesus the most! It was a reward, not a punishment!
Since this is my first post I'll go ahead and add this in...if you don't know me, one of my favorite verses is Psalm 37:4, "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." When I truly delight in Christ I don't desire a warm comfortable bed or my favorite home-cooked dish. I could care less about a TV series or air-conditioned room. When I truly delight myself in the Lord, my desire is for more of Him. It's a sweet cycle...delight in Him, desire Him and find more delight, then more desire, etc.
Before I even left the country a few people told me something to this effect: "We're so glad you're going. We'll even be glad to support you financially. Basically, since you're going we won't have to." Seriously? We get so wrapped up in our physical circumstances, too attached to things or people. The result of this is that we completely miss out on God's blessings. I did not choose to do international mission work to make myself feel better or to look good in front of other Christians. I went because God led and I took joy in following.
It was a struggle to decide whether to put this blog out there because I thought it might offend someone. I can assure you that was in no way my intention in writing. There's just a passion busting out of me that wants to scream: JESUS IS ENOUGH! Why can't we understand that? Following Christ is not for the faint of heart. He demands a lot. As a matter of fact, he demands everything.
What is it that's holding us back? (Notice I did say "us"). What is so important that you and I are clinging to it desperately instead of giving it over freely to Christ? When will we understand that Jesus is all we need - no matter the circumstances - and that glorifying Him is our sole purpose and joy?
Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.
The World Race: 11 countries in 11 months. Now that's something I can blog about. Traveling on rickety European trains, riding elephants in Thailand, eating fried squid in Malaysia. The year was full of excitement. It went by in the blink of an eye and I can't believe I'm already settled in again at home. How can I begin to wrap up what went on? In what ways can I show you, tell you, how God changed my life? When will I ever figure out what "normal" looks like again?
Within my first few weeks back from the World Race I've had some chances to speak about my experiences. I'm sure I'll be processing the events of the past year for many years to come, but some thoughts have already grabbed my attention. Most recently I had an older woman say to me, with a smile on her face: "We're so glad you're home now. You don't ever have to go back there again do you?" I gave her a smile and a clever joke as an answer, not really wanting to show how I was feeling on the inside.
I know that people mean well, but they may not understand how their words that were meant to encourage can sometimes come off as shallow or selfish. In no way do I think this lady was insincere; she was a sweet person just trying to make conversation. The thing that got me was the implied meaning in her statement. "You don't ever have to go back there again do you?" Where did she think I came from? A deep dark prison cell in the middle of a desert? How terrible it must be to eat strange things, be dirty all the time and sleep on cold, hard surfaces. Those are temporary physical circumstances. Didn't she wonder about the powerful prayer times and the intimate worship sessions with believers in other nations? What about the spiritual gains of such a trip? I can't say that I was offended, just disappointed really. I wanted to tell her, I'm praying that I'll be given an opportunity to go back because those rough, dirty conditions are the very places where I felt Jesus the most! It was a reward, not a punishment!
Since this is my first post I'll go ahead and add this in...if you don't know me, one of my favorite verses is Psalm 37:4, "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." When I truly delight in Christ I don't desire a warm comfortable bed or my favorite home-cooked dish. I could care less about a TV series or air-conditioned room. When I truly delight myself in the Lord, my desire is for more of Him. It's a sweet cycle...delight in Him, desire Him and find more delight, then more desire, etc.
Before I even left the country a few people told me something to this effect: "We're so glad you're going. We'll even be glad to support you financially. Basically, since you're going we won't have to." Seriously? We get so wrapped up in our physical circumstances, too attached to things or people. The result of this is that we completely miss out on God's blessings. I did not choose to do international mission work to make myself feel better or to look good in front of other Christians. I went because God led and I took joy in following.
It was a struggle to decide whether to put this blog out there because I thought it might offend someone. I can assure you that was in no way my intention in writing. There's just a passion busting out of me that wants to scream: JESUS IS ENOUGH! Why can't we understand that? Following Christ is not for the faint of heart. He demands a lot. As a matter of fact, he demands everything.
What is it that's holding us back? (Notice I did say "us"). What is so important that you and I are clinging to it desperately instead of giving it over freely to Christ? When will we understand that Jesus is all we need - no matter the circumstances - and that glorifying Him is our sole purpose and joy?
Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.
- Psalm 90:14
Hey Hun,
ReplyDeleteNever lose what you have now. Never slip back into your old life. There is no room for you there. God has grown you so much!
Keep strong, and share God's love with and even without intention.
~Caroline R.
Hannah,
ReplyDeleteI love reading your blogs. I believe it may take you a lifetime to truly process all that you have experienced this past year. Keep challenging us with your insights.
~ Bri's MoM
Hannah,
ReplyDeleteI felt in my heart and soul everything you were sharing! You have so much to tell that you must always share what is on your heart. From your intimate experiences you will refresh and encourage so many people's faith journey. I know that you have encouraged me! I am so thankful you were led into this mission field, and will be filled with joy in the next place God has planned for you. Whereever you go..I know...that your passion and love for the Lord will shine through. It is our gift from our Father to be intouch with everyone He sends our way. You are doing just that! Use this blog as God leads! Your words are inspiring, personal and real! Praying a special prayer of dedication for your blog and your service to the Lord. You must come and visit! love you! Megan's mom
I would have had a hard time responding civilly to comments like that. What does she thing--you were forced to go in the first place? I'm glad you're home but I'd be just as glad if you were in another part of the world because you're doing what we are all called to do: be a witness for Christ in all nations... including the US, including Malaysia, including places where we don't want to go...
ReplyDelete<>< Katie